Here I sit, sigh, trying to decide what to do. just before Christmas i had to wean off of my meds to go on to another type, but as i got off of them I felt just fine. So PC and I decided to stay off of the new meds and just take it one day at a time. I’ve been fine for a very long time, but….well…PC said this morning that maybe it’s time to start the new ones.
I just don’t know, though. I’ve been sick for three weeks with a cold. I’ve broken a tooth and had to have it repaired, had a horrible panic attack in the dental chair which still makes me tear up as I write, and I’m totally behind in everything I have to do. Maybe it’s just life making me crazy and sad. How will I ever know the difference? I hate this so much. What do the sane people do?
Oh well, maybe I’ll just wait through the weekend and see. I don’t wanna do drugs anymore. I just don’t.
2 comments:
I totally understand. But it is a triumph, not a failure, to take control and say - I don't want to be sad and withdrawn anymore, I want to be manic :)
Personally, I'm a fan of not dragging myself down, if you know what I mean. Power through. I'll say something like "Ok, this has been a terrible day but I've got to do this, this and this before I can stop and be sad about it". Then when I'm in the middle of something, it's harder for me to think about my bad day because I'm thinking about what I'm doing. That's me, though.
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